On The Beach Education Corporation

I was in prayer tonight and reflecting on the many blessings bestowed upon me. I’ve been thinking of a Christmas or New Year’s letter to inspire everybody. Let every heart rejoice. Joy to the world and all that. Instead, the words “inconsolable pain” came in to my head. And a smile touched my lips in fond memory of those dark years. Yes, I remember that terrible decade, nine years actually. That memory is a good friend today. That’s why I have such joy in my life. To the extent that one travels on their journey through pain, there is that much more joy on the other side. My journey through the valley of the shadow of death began August 1986 and ended December 1995.

So here is my letter of exhortation which means to persuade, inspire, encourage. I consider myself rather dense and stubborn. Why else did it take nine years for me to get the lesson? Between August to December 1986, I experienced one of the most traumatic and despicable acts of betrayal that one person can perpetrate on another. It sent me into a clinical depression. I was having nervous breakdowns. My body would have shaking fits and I’d go temporarily blind. It got to the point where I could not function. I couldn’t even go shopping. Every day I wanted to die. I didn’t want to live. But there was one thing that kept me going every day, day after day. I lived in the moment because that’s all I had and this is the promise that I kept repeating to myself…

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11. This one promise kept me alive.

You see, at the time, in the morass of my despair, depression and inconsolable pain, I could not see the work that was being wrought by invisible Hands. I could not see the promise in my non-existent future. I had no future. There was no future. It did not exist for me. There was only pain, an excruciating indescribably delicious pain. Because if you can feel pain, then you are feeling. And if you are feeling, that means you are alive. And that makes you rare and unique.

To be able to feel such intense emotions is a wonderful gift. We are the only creatures with the ability to feel and reason. And my reasoning at the time was “why is this happening to me?” which is the wrong question. Every thing happens all the time to every one. It’s how we interpret it.

It took a very long time for me to figure that out because I was stubborn and refused help. But eventually there came a day…  that day … DD-Day. I call it the Do or Die Day.

It’s hard to imagine that I allowed myself to suffer for six years before I sought professional help. I had been terribly hurt by a “counselor” who wanted to heal me. Now I had to make a conscious decision to accept the help of a counselor because I really couldn’t help myself. That decision was frightening. To be vulnerable and exposed to even worse injury. But there was something far worse that drove me forward: survival is not living. I felt dead and I needed to be alive. I couldn’t stand being the walking dead any more. I would rather die trying to live than pretend wanting to die. If I had to be hurt again, so be it. It really couldn’t have gotten any worse than it was.

Because deep down inside you, there is a Truth. I call it a Knowing. You know that you are Loved; that you are Cherished; that you are Precious; that you are so much more resourceful than you can ever know. Every cell in your body is a miracle. You are a miracle.

Our problem is that we take everything for granted. Every thing has a purpose, a teaching, a lesson. The universal design is all about increase, expansion, growth. It’s the law of life: if you are not growing, you are automatically dying. Take a lesson from any plant. And when a plant dies, there is a re-birth. There is new seed, new roots, new blossoms, new fruit.

You know that you are part of a Grand Design do you not. You feel it. And it’s really hard to describe. Yucky is a temporary stage. It is but for a season. I thought that seasons ran in three month intervals. That’s the weather seasons for the planet Earth. There is an experiential season for your soul and the time frame varies. You don’t have to go through nine years of your own personal hell to get the lesson. I was just extra stubborn. And my reward … extra love, extra joy, extra energy.

When you walk through the valley of the shadow of death, you come out the other side a far wiser, stronger, brilliant, compassionate soul. It’s not something you can read about or think about. It is an experience that fortifies your character and strengthens your resolve beyond anything imaginable. You enter the valley like a dirty lump of coal. Add a little heat, pressure and time. You exit the valley as the brilliant diamond that you are. Because your true calling is to be a light unto the world. And this is how I stand in the gap for our hurting brothers and sisters. Look beyond the hurt. You are being groomed by the Supreme Intelligence to answer your calling. You are the Chosen One. You are not given any experience that you cannot bear. It just feels like you can’t take it but believe me. You can. You are more resilient than you can ever know. God knows it. I know it.

Today, I am a testament to my pain, my tears and my fears. I thank my ashes for out of them I have created beauty.

Isaiah 61:3 “To give them beauty for ashes”

Looking back and reflecting on my life, it would certainly have been shameful to let all that despair go to waste. I wish for you to see the beauty that awaits you; the promises to be fulfilled. You need to stay for the pay off.

Not in a thousand years could I have imagined the rewards that my Heavenly Father would bestow upon me today. I am truly blessed. The richest blessing of all is the connection that I have with you, my network. Thank you for being you. I have gifted each and every one of you a special blessing from my heart to yours. Namaste.

I just spent 5-1/2 days from December 8 to 13 with Tony Robbins at Date With Destiny in Scottsdale, Arizona. If you ever have a chance to go, this is a premiere event and a definite two thumbs up. Tony’s style of teaching has become more rounded and holistic, I believe, due in large part to his eleven year relationship with his wife Sage. He’s come up with some brilliant relationship analogies which I will share one of my insights here with you.

Humans have an animal part of the brain, the limbic system, which is responsible for the fight or flight response. This is hard-wired in to us as a survival mechanism.

Early in our history, we can delineate two types of people: hunters and gatherers.

Hunters were male. They were physically stronger. Their brains developed to focus on the hunt. They seek prey, hunt prey and bring food back to the tribe. The tribe survives. Their primary mandate is to solve a problem and fix it. They really can only think one thing at a time. Mental distractions were costly to the hunt. The more distracted they became, the less efficient they were at catching game. The more they fixated, the more successful they were in the hunt.

Gatherers were female. They took care of the tribe. Their brains developed to multi-task on many different things simultaneously. Gatherers would be on the look out for berry markers. They seek out forage, reconnoiter the meadow for viable fruit, nuts and berries. They would mark each bush or tree and take detailed notes on the stage of ripeness, including which berries were good to eat and which berries were poisonous. The more detailed notes they retained, the better they ensured the survival of the tribe. After a berry marking trip, the gatherers would return to the tribe and give each other a Meadow Report. Gatherers were also preyed upon by larger animals and were especially vulnerable when the hunters were out. The Meadow Report ensured that everyone knew where the berries were in case something happened to that gatherer.

In today’s modern world, relationships are still based on the basic hunter/gatherer primal instincts. A couple has a discussion. The woman goes on and on and on with her grocery trip “meadow report”. The man’s version of the grocery trip is, “Went to the store, got milk.” The report is concise, focused and to the point which is what men are designed for. And he also solved a problem and fixed it by bringing the milk home. In his animal brain, he’s a hero. The woman’s version of the same grocery trip is about five minutes long and includes how she was feeling, tangents, related bits and pieces that don’t quite seem to fit into the description but relevant, why she needed the butter, and it goes on. The man is going insane. He wants her to get to the point.

And the point is … the Meadow Report is the point.

It’s what women do. Men don’t have to understand it. Just know that there’s nothing to solve or fix. Women just want to “meadow report” and it’s very natural for them. All men have to do is sit/stand patiently and listen. You don’t have to understand. Just be there and listen. And you’ll have a happy wife/girlfriend.

Men like to solve problems and fix things, especially for women. It’s what they’re designed to do so let them. When they do something for you, no matter how small, praise your man and tell him he’s your hero. Watch how it makes him feel. A kind word can make a man move mountains.

It’s pretty cool to see this in action in a room full of 2000 people. I highly recommend attending a Date With Destiny when you can. This is definitely an event worth re-attending in a few years.

December 22, 2009

I don’t know what it is lately but I’ve been getting requests from my network recently asking me to tell them what to buy, when to buy and where to buy. Dear July, I want to buy real estate. Do you think this is a good deal? Should I wait? Should I buy? What do you think?

Honestly, I really can’t answer questions like that. I know what I’d like to buy, when to buy and where to buy because I’ve been doing research and due diligence specific to my investment criteria. I have a plan, a written plan with a ten year time line. Actually, it’s an eighty year plan broken into ten year increments, broken into yearly goals, broken into quarterly intentions, broken into weekly tasks, broken into daily action steps where I can monitor my specific and measurable results. All I can say for sure is that if you don’t have a written plan, you really don’t know what you want. It’s all milling around in your head and you need to get it on paper.

My research is designed for me and my investors. This means that my investing style and investment criteria may not match your investing style or investment criteria. Imagine that!

What’s good for me is not necessarily the right thing for you. The hard thing is to do the work to find out what kind of lifestyle you desire in ten years, twenty years, thirty years, a hundred years from now, for yourself, your family, your inner circle, the world. That end goal is the magnet pulling you forwards. It will determine your short term goals and your long term intentions. You will start to plan things from a different perspective.

Invest the time in yourself to study the market: the real estate market, the stock market, the global economy, the local economy. Look for trends and be a contrarian. The trend is your friend as long as the trend is going your way. When the trend is nuclear fallout, everybody gets contaminated. The work comes in doing the research to find out when to pull out, or when to buy at the right time, or when to sell at the right time, or when to wait.

There are so many factors involved in such a simple question. In my earlier private sessions with clients, it would take on average 3 to 4 hours to discern an intelligent answer and the implementation would take up to a year.

I’ve seen too many people get into trouble by running after a seemingly good deal. It may appear to be a good deal from the other person’s perspective but is it really the best investment for you at your current stage. If a deal is going to be a winner, make sure it’s in your best interest.

December 22, 2009

If you have investments that you are depending on for retirement, then the book “Conquer the Crash” by Robert R. Prechter Jr. is a must read. Today’s financial world is not for the blithely ignorant passive investor, you will lose most or all of your money if you are. The financial world is no longer static, you can’t just leave your money in a savings account, GIC, Stock, commodity, forget about it and prey it’s there for you when you retire. Those days are gone, never to return. You are empowered to take control of your money. Start today. Read a book. Hey, I don’t profess to understand everything in Robert Prechter’s book. I’m intelligent and I can study. I’m learning for my sake and for my investors. It’s pretty scary when you see “206 trillion dollars of US based notional amounts of derivative contracts and 800 trillion dollars tethered to the global financial system… with total US savings at 700 billion dollars. Keep in mind that all paper money systems in history have failed!” Exert from Hillier advisers December update. As dire as all this may be there are solutions and strategies you can take to mitigate your future losses and prepare for a buying spree at 10 cents on the dollar when the dust settles. It starts by educating yourself so you can take the right action for your financial goals. Be a smart investor.

This blog will be of interest to anyone who owns real estate in Ontario. I’ve been noticeably absent because I have been living in Ontario, having taken over active management of 243 units.

I mentioned in my July News in October newsletter that one of our decision making questions is whether we would be willing to move to where the portfolio is located as a worst case scenario. This decision is not made without adequate research first, about 60 to 80 hours worth, in order to determine the area’s demographics, economic fundamentals, amenities, etc. When our answer is yes, this means we are committed to the successful operation of that building. So far we’ve only had to spend a few weeks here and there to oversee renovations with buildings in Northern BC.

Between November 2008 to May 2009, we purchased seven apartment buildings in Thunder Bay, Ontario. Buying real estate is just the first step in the real estate investing process. The real business of real estate is in property management … pro-active property management.

It soon became clear that the property managers handling the portfolio had poor systems and controls. It became necessary to take extraordinary measures. This decision meant that we would be living in Thunder Bay for several weeks or months to stabilize the portfolio, establish clearly defined systems and controls, implement and enforce policies and procedures, create a maintenance schedule, streamline administrative protocols for everything from the rent roll, deposit procedures, move-in reports, move-out reports, auditing all tenant files, create a property management manual with all forms in a template format. The idea is to create a system that requires as little thinking as possible. This has been my job for the past four weeks.

The first order of business after firing the managers is to do an audit because the first order of priority is getting the money process under control. You must double check all of their information to ensure accuracy. I created a simple rent roll audit in Microsoft Excel with 36 columns, starting with the building, suite numbers, tenant name, tenant phone number, gross rent amount, discount rent amount, net rent payable, rental supplement portion, tenant portion payable of rent supplement, last month rent deposit in, last month rent deposit out, description area, move-in date, assigned parking spot, twelve months to schedule 90-day notice to increase rent, new rent increase amount, difference of rent increase, effective date of rent increase, and when to deliver the rent increase notice.

Review the entire contents of every tenant file individually and verify. Note the discrepancies and update any new information. Create a task list for every file. Trends will start to emerge. This template becomes your new master rent roll.

One of the trends I noticed immediately was something the property managers did not do. In Ontario, there is no security deposit or damage deposit. Any damage done to the suite must be invoiced separately. Landlords can only collect a last month rent deposit that must accrue interest according to the legislated amount effective January 1st of every year. According to the Residential Tenancy Act, Landlords are permitted to issue a 60 day notice to use the last month rent accrued interest towards their rent payment, instead of paying it out.

This may seem like a small amount on a yearly basis when you consider a 1.8% interest accrual on a $700 deposit is $12.60. I just issued a cheque request to refund the LMR interest to a vacating tenant in excess of $100. This refund amount could have been used to offset previous rent payments if previous management had chosen to implement it.

Once the rent roll is verified, the next step is to create a system for handling non-payment of rent. Our corporate policy is to issue a Form N4 Notice to End a Tenancy Early for Non-Payment of Rent on the second day of the month. You must train your tenants to pay rent on or before the first day of each and every month. When a Form N4 is issued, the Landlord must wait 14 days after the N4 is delivered before they can apply for an eviction. So if you issue an N4 on Day 2, the soonest you can apply for an L1 Application to Evict a Tenant is on Day 17. The L1 Application costs $170 and the Landlord Tenant Board schedules a hearing. Hearings occur every 2 weeks. By the hearing, you are already near month end. At the hearing, the judge makes the ruling. And it’s here where you really need your paperwork in order.

There are other forms at the Landlord’s disposal such as a Form N5 which can be used when a tenant disturbs the peaceful enjoyment of the community for others or willfully damages property. The delivery of two N5’s within a six month span is grounds for an automatic eviction. Or a Form N8 can be used to evict a tenant for the consistent late payment of rent. This information is available at www.ltb.gov.on.ca.

Your property management tools should include a copy of these files in binders: the Province’s Residential Tenancies Act, the local area’s city by-laws, animal/pet by-laws, Smoke Free Act, Landlord Tenant Board forms, and a binder with tenant forms.

The most common tenant complaint is excessive noise. There is a noise by-law in effect from 11pm to 7am. A Form N5 can be issued for tenants who disturb tenants during these hours. Registration of pets is mandatory. For example, the penalty for an unregistered cat is $155. The Smoke Free Ontario Act prohibits smoking inside public buildings. Fines start at $305 for tenants caught smoking in the hallways. There are fines imposed for pet owners who do not adhere to the local Poop and Scoop by-laws. My desire is to stop these nuisance calls coming in to the manager’s office and empower the tenants to call the appropriate enforcement office.

It is your responsibility to familiarize yourself with the local rules, regulations and laws. There are parts of the Residential Tenancies Act that the local property managers were not even aware of, which we are implementing. Just because you hire a property management company or manager(s) does not relieve you of your fiscal responsibilities.

The next area to tackle is to create a seamless move-in process. You can pretty much estimate how many turn-overs your building will have. Prepare a Tenant Move-In Folder with these 19 forms created in a template:
1.    application form
2.    credit check consent form
3.    lease agreement (2 copies)
4.    tenant rules and regulations (2 copies)
5.    memo: rent cheques made payable to …
6.    pet application
7.    pet registration
8.    move-in welcome letter
9.    tenant insurance requirement letter
10.    information for new tenants from the Landlord Tenant Board
11.    memo: no tampering with safety devices (required by fire marshall)
12.    memo: managing moisture in your suites (to reduce/eliminate condensation)
13.    animal by-laws hand out
14.    Smoke-Free Ontario Act hand out
15.    Form N9 Tenant’s Notice to Terminate the Tenancy
16.    suite condition prior to vacating
17.    tenant move-out check list
18.    end of tenancy report
19.    inspection report
20.    rewards program

Every tenant file is prepared with these forms ready to go. You will have noticed that the move-out forms are included in the move-in file. Prepare your tenants in advance of your expectations for when they eventually move out and how much it will cost them if they do not clean the suite according to your instructions. One copy will be the tenant file copy. The other copy will eventually become the tenant’s copy. There is a hard copy version and an electronic version.

Now that these systems are in place, I am writing up step-by-step instructions for the new manager(s).

Once this is done, our next assignment is to conduct a suite-by-suite inspection of all the units (again) and note any deficiencies, repair items, replacement items for a longer term maintenance project. This is something we do right after acquisition so we can schedule and prioritize our maintenance items and budget.

Your property manager is your business partner. The operation of any multi-family residential apartment building or complex requires partnership with many players. Keep documentation on your communications and monitor results. Poor performance can mean lack of understanding, lack of skills, lack of human resources or apathy. However, I’ve noticed that attitude is everything. The right attitude can overcome miscommunication, can acquire new skills, can attract the right manpower. The right attitude can create happy tenants, happy contractors and a well run building.

I’ll be here in Thunder Bay for a couple more months streamlining the systems we’ve put into place, hiring and training the right managers for the property, before I look at buying more property.

p.s.  I may be here working but I am here by choice. The few weeks of effort that we put in now will pave the way for a lean, mean, passive-income, money-making machine.

November 17, 2009

I receive a fair amount of email from people asking me to support this or that charity. Due diligence is due diligence whether you are researching real estate investments or charities. One of my first due diligence tasks is to Google the charity. My second task is to Google the Federal Charities Directorate or to go their website at http://www.cra-arc.gc.ca/charities/ and type the name of the charity in their search bar. All legitimate charities have a Federal charitable number that is 9-digits long followed by RR0001. It looks like this: 123456789RR0001.

The following excerpt is taken from an article in The Toronto Star newspaper so you can understand how charities work:

“One of the challenges in regulating charities is that they fall between federal and provincial law. The federal government operates the Charities Directorate, part of the Canada Revenue Agency. Charities are tax exempt and can issue federal tax receipts to donors. Provincial authorities, usually through the Public Guardian’s office, also have the power to step in and take a charity to court if it is doing something wrong. The guardians across Canada rarely take action. The Star found the primary regulator, the federal Charities Directorate, is virtually powerless to deal with problem charities. To begin, tax law forbids it from warning the public about bogus or wayward charities. The directorate, which is part of the Canada Revenue Agency, treats charities the same way the taxman treats personal taxpayers. So, even when auditors have found a charity is doing little or no good work at all they cannot tell the public. Each year about 800 to 1,000 charities are audited and half are told they have done something wrong, but the public can’t find out, even if it would be of major importance. Kevin Donovan can be reached at 416-869-4425 or charity@thestar.ca”

This excerpt from The Earth Times posted August 10, 2009:

“Registered charities in Canada perform valuable work in our communities, and Canadians support this work in many ways. The CRA regulates registered charities through the Income Tax Act and is committed to ensuring that charities operate in compliance with the law. Where a registered charity is found not to comply with its legal requirements, the CRA may apply monetary penalties or may suspend or revoke the charity’s status under the Income Tax Act.

The CRA is reviewing all tax shelter-related donation arrangements (for example, schemes that typically promise donors tax receipts worth more than the actual amount of the donation), and it plans to audit every participating charity, promoter, and investor. For more information about tax shelters, go to the CRA’s Tax alert Web page at www.cra.gc.ca/alert. For more information about the registration of Canadian charities, go to the CRA’s Charities and Giving Web page at www.cra.gc.ca/charities.

Contact: Canada Revenue Agency, Noel Carisse, Media Relations, 613-952-9184.”

To read the full article, http://www.earthtimes.org/articles/show/the-canada-revenue-agency-revokes,921485.shtml.

Under the Canada Income Tax Act Article 188.1 Undue Benefits explains what does not qualify as a charitable deduction.

There are some 80,000+ charities in Canada. It is impossible for auditors to review all these charities on a timely basis and can take up to 7 years to stop a fraudulent charity. It is up to you and your due diligence to determine where you wish to donate your hard earned monies.

Protocol seems to be a lost art these days so this is a lesson on how to make a great first impression when making contact with a complete stranger. Be prepared because it shows when you aren’t.

It’s a fantastic experience to be inspired by someone you admire and respect. In the emotional rush, you send a vaguely written e-mail asking for help or for a referral. To make it worse, you sign off only with your first name.

From my end, I see an e-mail from an excited person named Jane or John and their e-mail address. Their message says they need help and not much else. There is no last name, no address, no phone number, no commitment. I call these anonymous e-mails. The onus is placed on your role model/mentor to come through for you in your time of need. You have just sabotaged yourself.

Considering that I manage 8 different businesses and receive hundreds of e-mails every week, an e-mail like this is a time management issue. It becomes low priority if you don’t spend the time to explain how you discovered the resource that subsequently inspired you, where you currently are in your life (financial, personal, career), what your 10 year long term goals are, why you want to achieve this (your big why), your mission, vision and purpose clearly stated (you can have both corporate and personal mission/vision/purpose statements), and your short term action plan, preferably in increments of 3 months outlining your first year. Also helpful is sending a bio/resume explaining what you have studied to date and your experiences.

Put yourself in your mentor’s shoes. You are a multi-millionaire managing multiple business enterprises. You read your own email from this perspective. How would you respond?

So here is the plain and simple truth that you most likely won’t hear from other mentors because they are just too busy to respond.

Signing off as “Jane” or “John” is deemed unprofessional and the mark of an amateur. Business people want to deal with professionals. How you craft your message should appeal to the CEO/President as if they are reading correspondence from a peer/admirer.

Anonymous sign-offs is an indication that you are hiding information. That is a red flag indicator in my due diligence toolkit.

No explanation leaves everything else to guess work. My role as a mentor is about guidance and direction, not so much about giving answers. Getting answers is easy and requires no work. Getting you to think is the most precious gift a mentor can give you. Sometimes we can see that in order to get a specific result, the answer you think you want is not the answer you need. There are intermediate steps that are absolutely essential to support the foundation of your desired goal.

If you aren’t getting the results you want in your life, you may be curious to observe how you respond to situations and what your underlying motivation is. In the real estate business, the successful people are givers. How can you educate and empower the people who are already in your life? Because, if you aren’t doing this right now, getting into real estate will only magnify this deficiency.

This advice is for those of you who are serious about getting into real estate investing. Your first point of entry is to get your newsletter started. Contrary to popular belief, real estate is not about real estate, in my experience. Real estate is about people. And you can’t buy real estate without gaining their trust and without trust you won’t find the money. This process is explained in my book Your Million Dollar Network (www.yourmilliondollarnetworkbook.com) and is the one of the pillars of my real estate success, and those of my students.

People who are in denial continue blithely on as if nothing is amiss until D-Day: deadline day. This is a common strategy for people who are in over their heads. I have seen this with alcoholics, relationships and foreclosures. Tony Robbins says that there are no unresourceful people, only unresourceful states.  D-Day can be avoided by getting into a resourceful state. When you are resourceful, your human potential is limitless.

The solution is in what you focus on. When you are heading down that downward spiral, people tend to focus on what’s wrong. They ask the wrong questions. Why is this happening to me? This only reinforces what they are doing wrong. The solution is to ask better questions. How can I resolve this situation? The answer is that you can’t resolve it on your own. You need help. Albert Einstein said it best when he said 
the significant problems we face cannot be resolved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them. This means you have to “up” your level of thinking and this is easily done through the assistance of other minds.

The first step towards change is awareness.  Seek out a mentor, counsellor, advisor who can assess your situation objectively. I’ve seen people in denial while they lose their business, their marriage, their home, their job and for some, their life. But there is hope. There is help and a way out, a way up. The secret is in adjusting to a new strategy.

The current strategy you are using is producing a certain result. Repeating that strategy will only produce more of the same result. Expecting a different result while doing the same thing over and over is called insanity. So now that you know that whatever you are doing right now is producing the results in your life, just know that you are an expert at this strategy. You are getting consistent results, only not the type you are expecting. You know what this means? You are an expert at getting consistent results. You already have that skill. All you have to do is tweak your strategy so that it starts producing a different result.

Acknowledge that denial is now dead. You can choose to resurrect a new you, a new attitude, a new strategy. It will be different and it will be a new adventure.

Once you have made the decision to tackle your challenge head on, your immediate goal is to map out a short term plan with simple steps that can be implemented right away. These little steps will take you towards your long term goal.

For example, if you are unable to make your mortgage payments, be proactive and call the bank. Speak with the manager and explain your financial hardship. They will work with you if you give them the chance. The last thing they want to do is foreclose.

If you are relying on a client to pay their bill and they haven’t paid you for several months, it’s time to start collections and get new clients. You can get a retainer or a deposit up front to help with your cash flow. All you have to do is ask. Make this a new business policy.

If you are facing bankruptcy, call the creditors and negotiate a payment plan. Review your financial statement every month and pick one item to address.

If your rent is more than your income, find a smaller place to live. Where is your discretionary income going?

If you haven’t done your taxes, the government will catch up to you one day. When they do, they will garnish your wages and freeze any assets you own, on top of the penalties and interest. There are law firms that can negotiate on your behalf. Do your tax returns. If you can’t do it yourself, call someone who can help you so you can start learning today.

If you are in an abusive relationship, you need counselling immediately. Hoping the other person will change is not hope. This is denial. You need to help yourself first before you can help anyone else.

If you have lost your job, then you can choose to find another job or become an entrepreneur. There are all sorts of businesses that you can start up immediately and start making cash now. Borrow a lawnmower and start mowing lawns. Charge $35 per mow and give back $5 for the use of the lawnmower. Mow 3 lawns and you’ve made $105 - $15 = $90. Keep your receipts. Keep a record of your sales. A bookkeeper or accountant can show you how to save more money at tax time by helping you take legitimate deductions. Start babysitting, berry picking, snow shovelling, fix computers, teach how to use Microsoft Excel or any other software program, tutor students, pet walking service, car detailing, concierge service, personal shopper for the elderly, virtual assistant, social media manager, write newsletters for other people, be a ghost writer, custom crochet work, sell your knitting, sell your crafts at the flea market or on eBay, teach people how to make jam or do canning, create art from driftwood, balance rocks on top of each other, and so on.

Just take a look at what you are already competent at. Take an inventory of things that you take for granted because you know how to do it. There are other people who are willing to pay you to do it for them. Make money from the skills you already have. Then when you have cash flow coming in, you can start learning new skills that will generate more income.

Now it’s up to you to flick that switch in your brain. Your journey from here is not alone. You will do it in partnership with your success partner, your mentor, your counsellor, your advisor, your friends.  Denial is a river in Egypt. Make a choice to be resourceful. You are more resourceful than you can ever know.

My friend and colleague, Elaine Allison, has written a very simple and powerful book for women in positions of leadership or aspiring to be in a leadership position. She was one of Canada’s first female prison guards in an all-male maximum security prison. That takes a lot of courage and strength that is more than a physical strength. Real strength comes from mental preparedness that through experience translates into a special kind of mental toughness. In Elaine’s words, this is a Velvet Hammer - A woman of strength and courage, taking on a leadership role. That role could be as a mother leadership role, as a mentor and guide, a volunteer, as a supervisor or manager or CEO. Women’s leadership styles are significantly different than that of men. We are soft and firm, nurturing and disciplining. It is not a woman’s place to act like a man. It is our place as women to be a woman in a position of leadership that is congruent with our leadership style.

Her book was also a great reminder for me of how to conduct disciplinary methodologies when dealing with employees and contractors. It is not something to be avoided. It is something to be addressed immediately in a specific manner. I’m using her book as a guide to create a corporate policy and procedure on disciplinary issues.

Contrary to popular belief, discipline is a good thing. It comes from the root word “disciple,” which means pupil, which in turn denotes student or learner. Discipline is what leaders practice to offer correction and instruction so the person being instructed is made aware of a certain issue and offered corrective measures to implement. Physical or verbal abuse is not discipline … it is abusive behavior. There’s a difference.

And men, there are some great insights into how women leaders operate at home and at work. The techniques in her book are useful for leaders of any gender.

www.thevelvethammer.com

Key #1: You must learn how to master frustration
A negative attitude wipes out self-discipline. In order to succeed in life, it’s about getting massive frustration. The more frustration you get, the more successful you get to be. Use frustration to motivate you. The other side of frustration is success. So few people learn how to manage frustration. Learn to turn frustration into fascination.

Key #2: You must learn how to manage rejection.
The key to success is receiving massive amounts of rejection. It’s part of the numbers game. Developing rapport can decrease the number of rejections. Until you learn to thrive on rejection, you won’t experience the level of success you could. The law of averages is if you do it enough, you’re going to develop an average rate of success. How many no’s does it take to get a yes? Superstars handle frustration and rejection.

Key #3: You must learn how to handle financial pressure.
Learn to manage the money that you have. Money becomes a tool for you instead of you being the tool of money. It’s not working hard that makes the difference. You got to change what’s in your head. Focus on not what you can get, but on what you can give.

In the book “The Richest Man in Babylon” by George Clason:
(a) take 10% of your money and immediately give it away
a. your unconscious believes there is more than enough
(b) take 10% and use it to reduce your debts
(c) take 10% and use it to invest, or save it to invest
The remaining 70% is to live on.

Key #4: You must learn how to handle or manage complacency.
This is a real killer - comfort zone gets involved. It sets in when you learn how to manage frustration, rejection, financial pressure. The only way you become happy is not what you get, it’s who you become.

Here’s the solution:
1. learn to judge yourself by your goals and not by your peers
2. pay careful attention to who you associate with

Key #5: Always give much more than you expect to receive.

This is the formula for wealth and happiness.

The secret to living is giving.

Notes taken by July Ono